So, I have decided that I am gonna rant here. This blog has been dead for almost a year. Mainly, because I wanted to build a website like Kris Carr. Or maybe like James Clear! A website that offers hope, health, healing and much more. A website that talks about ‘something useful.’
However, if there is something helpful or useful that needs to be published it needs extensive research and exploration. It takes time. Something I don’t have. Especially when you can find hundreds of such informational material on the internet. Nope! I don’t want to demean what they are doing. Because they have build credibility. Because every time I need some genuine advice on healing or habits, I look up to them.
But then it makes me think about my website.
What’s that ‘something different’ I am gonna offer?
This question depressed me so much that I completely stopped writing. But now I have decided that I will write. Well, nothing informational every time but mostly rants.
Ummmm.. You can call it rant or you can call it my daily interesting encounters.
Well, I don’t know if it will be interesting.
I was reading a book called Book of Delights by the American poet Ross Gay, and everything he has written is nothing less than mystic. He says that all the essays in the book are his everyday encounters. And then I look at my life.
What’s so interesting in my life to write?
A husband who sits in the front of TV whole day watching cricket match or Big Bang theory for the 1000th time, or some crap on YouTube, AND me.
Did you just see? I have nothing, absolutely nothing interesting to write. Many people write/talk about their interests. Something common to talk about makes them best of best friends.
But I don’t have any interests.
Except reading books and writing on a lesser known platform Quora, I don’t have any interests. Oh, wait! I do have an interest!! Yes! I love meditation. Every day I sit for almost two hours to meditate (wow! That’s some number!!!!)
But now I think that’s because it does not involve any activity. I just have to sit and don’t do anything. Basically I am lazy and meditation is an escape route to show that I am productive while the truth is that I am just being dull, slothful, lethargic!
I look at my friends who are so busy living their lives. They work, they take care of their kids, they keep their house clean and still shine in the party. And then I look at me (I tried looking for an emoji perfectly suited for the mood, but could find none). I don’t work, I can’t keep my house clean, I don’t have kids and I honestly I suck at parties. Most of the time it feels like I have just gotten up from the bed. Especially when I look at my friends all dressed up. Ummm.. I should thank them for not outcasting me them from their circle.
Anyways, I am writing all this while waiting for my food order. My husband and I are on fasting today. My husband does the fast because of some religious reasons while I do the fast because it saves me from cooking (Yes, one more reason to label me as ‘Lazy’). But then fasting is tough too!! And therefore, most of the time by the evening I have this great urge to break the fast. I curse myself for not staying true to myself and pledge that this won’t happen the next time. Well, this ‘next time’ has yet not arrived. Because like every time, I broke my promise today too. Very soon a restaurant will deliver a southwest wrap for me.
And yes! It’s here with a knock on my door. That’s when my today’s rant will end.
If you think you liked it, that does not make you awesome. That makes you lazy and uninteresting like me.
If you are still here, you can visit the website again, as I plan to post my rants weekly.
And I swear I would be lazy for this too.
Your lazy blogger,